Thursday, September 26, 2013

Bullet Points

-I don't miss being pregnant.  I thought I would, especially knowing that this might have been the last time.  But it's nice to be able to squat down and play with Benjamin, or bend over, or just roll over in bed without needing a hoist. 

-Benjamin is still pretty screamy at times, like tonight we went to the embassy for some playground time and dinner and he was great.  Super well behaved, ate a great meal, and then once we got home and started the bedtime routine he freaked out.  Sigh.

-Daniel is taking bottles and is still latching great.  I feel so blessed to still be able to nurse him.  It is disheartening that I need to supplement, but I know he just needs nutrition so I'm trying to move past my own sadness and give him what he needs. 

-Daniel is getting better at using the pacifier.  Because Benjamin had bottles basically from the beginning maybe that's why he loved the pacifier so much, but Daniel has to be convinced to take it.  I really need him to love it, so we're working on it.  Little by little I think he'll get into it.

-I ordered a stuffed fox to be Daniel's monthly picture animal.  It's from the same company, Jellycat, that made the alligator/crocodile we got for Benjamin for Christmas.  They're super soft.  Benjamin is completely enamored of this thing, so I'm telling him that Daniel is sharing with him. 

Funny face.

Super sweet.

Why is this thing in my seat?

-Benjamin is still really sweet to Daniel, giving him kisses and pats many times a day.

-I feel almost back to normal, I have my postpartum doctor appointment in a couple weeks.  I'm out of maternity clothes and wearing some "fat jeans" that I hadn't worn in a while before I got pregnant.  I'm ready to be back at a stable size so I can buy some black jeans, but I should probably quit eating Snickers and cookies to be at my previous size.  My goal is to hit the gym at least once a week starting in January, maybe earlier if it seems doable. 

Four weeks postpartum.  A ways to go, slowly but surely.  Ignore the poofy hair.

-The weather here was gorgeous a few days ago, highs in the low 70s.  Today was warm again, low 80s, but fall is definitely coming.  The evenings are cooler and I can't wait to wear sweaters and boots.  Which brings me back to needing black jeans.

-I realized a week or so ago, that it's been a year since my miscarriage.  It was Sept. 11 that I went to the doctor and he told me the baby was gone.  A few days later I had the D&C.  So many women shared their stories with me, and many more have since.  I'm so grateful for that pregnancy, which only lasted about 8 weeks.  I think the D&C and subsequent hormones allowed us to get pregnant without fertility treatments, which I didn't think possible.  I'm grateful to God for both my children.  I don't know why He has blessed us and not others.

-Sleep is still elusive, Daniel can go for about 5 hours once a night, if we're lucky.  It's just tough to make myself go to bed early, especially if Thomas is up watching something fun.  But I desperately need to sleep as much as possible, to maintain sanity and some level of kindness toward Benjamin.  Here's hoping once Daniel hits two months he'll be able to make it through the night.

That's all for now!

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